Friday, July 11, 2008

Incurable a/k/a Hopeless.....

So, many of you have followed and asked about my friend Shawnna. As a recap she and I were college roommates. She is just a few short years my senior, not to mention, 3 beautiful children, one heart wrenching divorce and the recent diagnosis of breast cancer. Shawnna and I both fell madly in love with Jesus after college thus sharing a now even deeper friendship as sisters in Christ. She lives in Jackson, Tennessee and thank goodness for us being "IN" with Verizon Wireless because we talk several times a day. I think she enjoys as much adult conversation as she can get her hands on due to the 3 sweet girls at home with a less than mature vocabulary. I enjoy a Jesus pick me up like none other as she calls and tells me what God is showing her that day. I remember my flippantness as she went to the doctor for "tests" and I will never forget the day I was standing in the middle of Walgreen's when she called and said it was cancer. CANCER, you have got to be kidding. We are young, we are moms, did I just hear her correctly? I walked out of the store as white as a ghost. Now, several months, surgeries, and hair losses later she has completed chemo and gone back in for the next round of scans. Again, I flippantly chatted as she went in saying this was it for sure, well, once again, the news, incurable. A text that she sent that drove my knees so quickly to the floor and sobs so loud that I almost woke my sleeping baby boy. I had nothing to give. Nothing to offer as far as encouragement, love, hope, Jesus. All I could offer was loud cries and loud whys. Finally, an hour or so later I pulled it together to call and then started sobbing as soon as she said hello. (great friend I know) My selfish self sat on the phone as my godly friend forced me to pull it together and honor our Heavenly Father! See Shawnna has received a promise from the Lord during her quiet time that she will be healed. I, having seen tons of miracles and tons of promises fulfilled, don't at all doubt that promise. I am just sick and tired of her pain. Her surgeries. Her hair. Her calling 2 days later after leaving pre-check in for her hysterectomy at 30. Shawnna told me that we should have literally thrown a party the day the Lord gave her that promise rather than shedding one single tear over man's diagnosis. SO, later that day I did manage to pull open my Bible and ask the Lord to show me a verse I could pray and this was what He led me to...Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere; I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked. (Psalm 84:10) WOW, see my Shawnna has dwelt many days in the house of the Lord. She has walked so tight with Him that she hears Him, feels Him, and knows Him by His name! God showed me that although I look at Shawnna and agonise over her pain, she has lived a more glorious life that millions of lost souls that I come in contact with every single day. Does my heart YEARN for them as it does for her? Do I cry out for their "pain"? Do I truly believe this verse is true? Well, today I am choosing YES! Yes, I do believe Shawnna has had a better life than millions and I will choose to let that word "incurable" be as much of a 4 letter word as many others I would not dare say! Jesus, you rock Shawnna's world. You blow Shawnna away with miracles, closeness and blessings that make all of us doubters sit with our chin in awe. Secondly, please show me who I can pray for to come into salvation through your Son, even if it is only for one day before they go to be with you for eternity in Heaven! Better IS one day in your house than a thousand else where!!!!!!!!!! I couldn't agree more and neither could she!

Gaining Perspective,

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