Wednesday, December 10, 2008

God's Grace.........

First, I want to thank so many of you for your prayers. Jeremy and I have had an outpouring of people who are loving and praying us through this season and we are eternally thankful. Friday morning we will be heading out of Elizabeth City and slowly, but surely making our way to Clarksville, Tennessee. We never totally unpacked because we had intentions of hopefully one day buying a house here, just another example of God’s amazing grace. One, that we aren’t trying to sell a house and two that our packing duties are at a bare minimum. I will probably get by with only a few more boxes and off we will be. I have been overwhelmed this week with God’s grace so I just wanted to share with you guys some “God moments” both big and small and encourage you with the loudest message that the Lord has repeatly rang through my ears that is best stated God blesses obedience! I have felt lately that our life looks so random. I mean come on Bullocks, make up your mind and just get a job. I can promise you that no one would love that life more than this family, but that is not the life the Lord has called us to live. The other night, when I (the world’s greatest sleeper, especially with pregnancy exhaustion still looming) couldn’t sleep, I knew the Lord was calling me to get out of bed and spend some time with Him. Quiet frankly, I wanted to sleep. I was tired both physically and mentally and just to be completely honest, the last Person I wanted to speak to was the One I felt was causing all of this. I heard the Lord so clearly whisper in my ear, “You are mad at me and I am not going to let you go to sleep until we talk.” I guess the Inventor of “do not let the sun go down on your anger” takes it seriously, who knew? I, being a “good Christian girl”, would have never said “I am mad at God” but that’s the problem or the blessing however you want to look at it, HE KNOWS OUR HEART. The coolest part is, He knows our heart and He can handle what it is thinking. He isn’t going through an identity crisis thinking, “oh no, I hope Kelly is not mad at me”. One, because He is 100% secure in who He is and two because He is perfectly assure of the fact that He has done nothing to harm me, that He is only desiring to bless me. I like to think of it as He is totally secure in His parenting. So, begrudgingly, I got up, sat on the couch and spent the next 30 minutes “venting” my case at why all of this was not in either of our best interest. He lovingly listened and then I felt the hug of a lifetime that was sealed with a promise of “I know what I am doing”. I then preceeded, while I was up and all, to watch a Beth Moore that sent me straight to my knees in awe because I can’t even remember a time when someone spoke so clearly into MY situation. I felt as if she had written her new study, “Esther” just for me and that week 4 was taped for that night of my life in particular. Since that night, I can’t tell you the hundred other encouraging moments I have had with the Lord, from another video solely telling me over and over that God did have a plan for me life [THANK GOODNESS], to a list of verses and even a text from a friend that all talked about God’s overwhelming theme in the Bible of obedience being followed by blessing. The Lord knew how to give me the final push to at least do what I know I supposed to do and that is to help my man get our family moved back to our homeland and to set up shop and keep praying for “the rest of the story” to be revealed. I look forward to the day that I write you guys a blog that will at least give another chapter. I am praying that chapter will put a few more of the puzzle pieces of our life together because quiet frankly, for now it looks like a big mess that has just been dumped out of the box. Please continue to pray for our “next step”. Pray that we hear God because a theme I keep seeing in my Bible study is to follow every step or every detail so we are going to need our ears keened to assure that happens. Secondly, my man is a worker, one day around the house is about all he can handle and then he starts going crazy so please pray that AS SOON as we get to Clarksville doors will begin to open. He takes his job as the provider of our family very seriously so nothing unnerves him more than not knowing how all the details will fall. Finally, for me, I have lived in a good place this last year of not being "stuff" focused and I am praying that as we move into our adorable rental house in Clarksville that the “stuff bug” will not come back to bite. I pray that we are content and aren’t nearly as focused on the empty hole of fulfillment as we are on the souls placed in our path that need nothing short of the Savior of the world, Jesus. And to close, I just had to share one last grace gift I received and some of you may have already had this same amazing blessing, but good golly, if you haven’t tried the new Peppermint Mocca coffee creamer, by all means, go out quickly and receive God’s latest gift to mankind. It is nothing short of heavenly!

hahahaha, love you all!

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